Just A Pinch

A minor misfortune befell me last night (actually early this morning). After all these years of me kvetching about the guys putting the toilet seat down, one of them did. They put down the whole lid, not just the seat. Hurray, right? Well, I didn't know that they had done this, it was 4 a.m., it was dark in there and I proceeded to take a seat. However, the toilet lid doesn't exactly fit the seat and where it has a slight overlap, that's where it happened. I pinched myself....hard.....at 4 a.m., right on the right backcheek. And now I have to come up with some excuse for why I am walking funny tonight at work. Ah, the joys of living in a male household.

I am currently teaching my one and two year olds to pick up after themselves. They are very good at it and they enjoy it. However, what they enjoy even more is taking what they have picked up and put away and dumping it out again all over the living room floor, and then pretending that they don't understand me when I tell them to pick up again. I think they just like seeing me work. (Must get that after their Dad!;))

I just realized today that when Grover cooks, he never washes the pans. He will wash the other dishes, sometimes, but he always leaves the pans 'to soak.' Ladies, this is a man's way of telling you that he is never, ever going to wash that pan. He will refresh the dishwater for three days but he is not going to wash it. It's just a tease. Don't fall for it!

My kids won't let me read a book to them. They won't sit still long enough. However, Lukas will read the yellow pages in the phone book and Jakob will read advertising circulars for hours at a time. If, in the future, I ever need a good plumber or need to know where I can get a good deal on a brake job I'm sure one of them will be able to tell me.

It's hard being a parent of toddlers sometimes. Occasionally, I feel disconnected from the world of grownups. I can't always tell you what happened on the news or HBO but I can darn sure tell ya what happened on Blue's Clues or Teletubbies (every parent's nightmare). And there was the time at the store when I told my best friend to use her 'indoor voice' please.

It's hard being married sometimes. When my young, single friends are talking about their latest conquest or I see new love in bloom, I admit I get a little envious. They are still on the variety packs of cereal and I am having oatmeal every day..........until I DIE! But then I remember, I like oatmeal. It's good for ya. As long as I don't have to wash the pan.

Peace allll..................