Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Painting, Puberty and Pumpkin Pies

Okay, so this is the weirdest thing to happen to me this week. Grover and I (and Rachel too) were painting a house for this lady. Didn't start off too bad, really. We were contracted to do the kitchen, living room, hallway and two bedrooms. So, after we had finished painting the kitchen, hallway and living room and pulling the paneling from the bedrooms (which is pain in the tuchus let me tell ya!), we were ready to begin the painting in the bedrooms. Now, we had told the lady that she needed to move her furniture, or at least the bulk of it, out of the bedrooms so that we would have room to do the job in there. She knew she had to do this but did she? Of course not. So she left the keys with us over the weekend because she was going out of town. So we are in this house, alone.

We start moving the furniture out of the bedrooms, blah, blah, blah. And this woman has a collection of Barbie dolls. You know, the seriously collectible ones, like the holiday Barbies, etc. in the original packaging. Well, I thought that was interesting, considering this lady is in her late 50's but hey, to each his own. She also had a fabulous Mickey Mouse collection. Anyway, I'm moving all of this stuff to a third bedroom and I finally get to the closet which of course needs painting also. I move some stuff out of the way in the top of the closet and guess what is staring me in my face? A Sleeping Beauty doll........in a glass coffin. A real miniature glass coffin. WHAT THE HECK? She could have told us about this before I ran across it in a strange house, alone in this room in a strange neighborhood in the almost the middle of the night! What kind of weird woman is this?? I mean, yeah, I had a Sleeping Beauty doll when I was like 6 but it wasn't in its own little coffin. Morbidity aside though, the glass coffin thing was really kind of pretty......but disturbing.

Lukas decided the dog was hungry today and dumped a 50 pound bag of dog food in the bedroom floor for her. Not so worried about the mess, just concerned as to how a 3 year old could drag a 50 pound bag of dog food into the bedroom and flip it upside down onto the floor. What, am I raising the Hulk here?

Jakob has decided to start calling me and Grover both Mom. Guess just one of us isn't doing the job well enough;)

Joshua had his first "puberty" class in school today. You know, the one that we used to call "hygeine" or "watered down sex ed." He was more than a little disgusted by the fact that he and a room full of boys had to watch a video showing nothing but penises for 30 minutes. (I can understand this....penises are not the most attractive things in the world...but I don't guess they have to be to get the job done huh?) One of his classmates made the remark that he wished they had accidentally switched the tapes so they could have watched the girls video (disgusting little troll;)) but like I told Josh, what women have is just as ugly as what men have so don't sweat it. They aren't going to be entered in any beauty contests anyway. (although I wonder who would win "pretty penis of the year".....okay, now I'm just grossing myself out)

Two things I want for Christmas this year....the entire set of Little House on the Prairie books (I love those) and.....The Magic Bullet! Have you seen the infomercials for that thing....pretty nifty.

Anyway, for those of my friends and family who have issues with the traditional Thanksgiving greetings: happy day before Turkey Murder Day....or Anniversary of Native Americans Getting Screwed Over by the White Man Day. (I'm half-Cherokee so I can use that one freely while stuffing my face:)).......I'll eat your piece of pumpkin pie if you don't want it....you being so ticked off and all.

Now, I have to go see if all of my Christmas tree lights work.....and hope that the dog doesn't try to eat them if they do.

Peace alllllll..........

2 comments:

Oh great One said...

What a great post! I cringed, I laughed, my heart jumped. Why did it jump? I HAVE the set of books! I got it when I was a kid. Funny thing about them, I gave them to my daughter who flies through books and she wouldn't read them. What do I find out this year? She IS reading them now but she gets the books from the classroom. WHAT? She has them on her bookshelf but she refuses to read them. Kids are weird.

I have see the Magic Bullet commercials. I've been tempted several times! I think I have seen them at Target though if you want to pass that on to Grover!

sprinkle4 said...

OGO: kids are insane for the most part....or else we are after we have them, I'm not sure which:). And Grover will be going to Target in the next couple of weeks. He just doesn't know it yet;)

BB: the magic bullet is a kind of food processor thingamajig...just a little smaller. You can do all sorts of neat stuff with it though. (Yeah, I know it sounds like some kind of freaky sex toy, but it isn't....at least this one isn't anyway:))