Yesterday at Church my children were asked by their Sunday School teacher to list five things for which they were thankful.
Lukas listed nothing but took the opportunity to draw a space galaxy on the paper given to him.
Jakob listed:
1. My house
2. My parents
3. Corn
4. Sliced carrots
5. My swimming pool
I think I am the most excited about the fact that Lukas has artistic ability beyond the pale for an 11 year old and that Jakob loves vegetables.
Peace allllllllllllll............
Monday, May 26, 2014
Tuesday, May 13, 2014
Good Things
God is good all the time.
Life is good most of the time.
Thankful for the life I have.
I think I'll start writing again. I have less time in the day than I used to but I still have a lot to say:)
Peace alllllllll............
Life is good most of the time.
Thankful for the life I have.
I think I'll start writing again. I have less time in the day than I used to but I still have a lot to say:)
Peace alllllllll............
Friday, December 02, 2011
Alone
I was addressing Christmas cards the other day (I like to get them out as early as I can) and among the list of 90 some odd names and addresses it was the first one that my eyes went to:
Mark Savage
PO Box 52
Harvest, AL
This had been my brother’s mailing address for the past 20 years of his 55 years on this Earth. This was the address that I sent my first Christmas card from my very first place of my own when I was in my early 20’s. This was the address from which I was guaranteed a Christmas card every year. It would be without fail a western Santa card: Santa on a horse somewhere in the snow with fences and pine trees. And it always made me feel proud to be on his Christmas list (his list consisted of a very few people and if you were on it you could consider yourself special) and his card took its rightful place at the top of my front door, right next to my mother-in-law’s “Florida” Christmas card (you know the ones: sandy beaches with palm trees decorated with Christmas lights). This year I will be leaving that spot empty as a reminder (not that I need one) of my first Christmas without my parents or any siblings, effectively an “orphan”. Of course my parents and my other brother and my sister have been gone for several years and Mark and I were the only ones left. And now I am the last man standing. It’s funny how heavy that moniker is.
I have been through grief before many times. This is different than grief. This is a feeling of separation that I have never experienced before. I am the only one left in my immediate family. No one else knows what I was like as a baby, or a little kid. No one knows how much I loved Snoopy and hated fractions and how I used to fall asleep between the bed and the wall in the summer because the wall was so cool (something my youngest Jakob does now). There is no one left to remind me of how silly I acted the first time I fell in love or how proud I was of my first job. There is no one left to connect with on that level. It leaves me feeling almost lost and certainly confused.
I can tell my boys stories about their “other” grandmother and grandfathers that they have never met and I can tell them about their Aunt Becky and their Uncle Kevin but it isn’t the same thing as being there. They knew Uncle Mark and they miss him too. If they want to talk about him we do but, as is the way of children, they don’t bring him up very often and I am glad. It means they are concentrating on the business of living, as I am most days too.
It may seem that I am wallowing in self-pity. I assure you that I am not. Some days it is necessary to stop and acknowledge how you are feeling in that moment and when the moment has passed to move on. I have stopped, I have acknowledged, and now I am moving on.
Peace allllll………………………………….
Mark Savage
PO Box 52
Harvest, AL
This had been my brother’s mailing address for the past 20 years of his 55 years on this Earth. This was the address that I sent my first Christmas card from my very first place of my own when I was in my early 20’s. This was the address from which I was guaranteed a Christmas card every year. It would be without fail a western Santa card: Santa on a horse somewhere in the snow with fences and pine trees. And it always made me feel proud to be on his Christmas list (his list consisted of a very few people and if you were on it you could consider yourself special) and his card took its rightful place at the top of my front door, right next to my mother-in-law’s “Florida” Christmas card (you know the ones: sandy beaches with palm trees decorated with Christmas lights). This year I will be leaving that spot empty as a reminder (not that I need one) of my first Christmas without my parents or any siblings, effectively an “orphan”. Of course my parents and my other brother and my sister have been gone for several years and Mark and I were the only ones left. And now I am the last man standing. It’s funny how heavy that moniker is.
I have been through grief before many times. This is different than grief. This is a feeling of separation that I have never experienced before. I am the only one left in my immediate family. No one else knows what I was like as a baby, or a little kid. No one knows how much I loved Snoopy and hated fractions and how I used to fall asleep between the bed and the wall in the summer because the wall was so cool (something my youngest Jakob does now). There is no one left to remind me of how silly I acted the first time I fell in love or how proud I was of my first job. There is no one left to connect with on that level. It leaves me feeling almost lost and certainly confused.
I can tell my boys stories about their “other” grandmother and grandfathers that they have never met and I can tell them about their Aunt Becky and their Uncle Kevin but it isn’t the same thing as being there. They knew Uncle Mark and they miss him too. If they want to talk about him we do but, as is the way of children, they don’t bring him up very often and I am glad. It means they are concentrating on the business of living, as I am most days too.
It may seem that I am wallowing in self-pity. I assure you that I am not. Some days it is necessary to stop and acknowledge how you are feeling in that moment and when the moment has passed to move on. I have stopped, I have acknowledged, and now I am moving on.
Peace allllll………………………………….
Wednesday, June 08, 2011
Sunday, April 24, 2011
Sunday, April 12, 2009
PBJ
This is a conversation that took place in my kitchen earlier this evening while Grover was making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for Jakob.
Jakob: Dad, please hurry and make my sandwich!
Grover: Relax, Jakob. You can't rush perfection.
Jakob: I'm not rushing perfection. I'm rushing YOU!
And this is one of the many reasons I love being a mom.
Peace allllllllll.............
Jakob: Dad, please hurry and make my sandwich!
Grover: Relax, Jakob. You can't rush perfection.
Jakob: I'm not rushing perfection. I'm rushing YOU!
And this is one of the many reasons I love being a mom.
Peace allllllllll.............
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Nicotine Cessation and Clarity of Thought
Wow, it's been a while huh?
When I quit smoking, almost a year ago, I never realized the effects that it would have on me mentally. Of course, I had read about the physical benefits and was told that the physical discomfort of withdrawal would not last very long. And that was true, all of it. I breathe better, I can actually smell things, I don't cough unless I have a cold and even then it is nowhere near as lung shattering as it was when I smoked a couple of packs a day. So, my body is grateful.
But I had never taken into consideration what my mind might go through during this process. It has been quite a trip. Let me explain.
Nicotine causes the brain to release dopamine. Dopamine causes a person to feel relaxed. Yes, that's an oversimplified statement or two but that's the upshot of the whole scenario. When one ceases ingesting nicotine, within 72 hours, the brain has started to basically rewire itself. (Brains are cool like that.) The brain is alright with that. You, as a new ex-smoker might not be......for a while. Because it takes a while to come through the other side of the looking glass.
For months, I could not concentrate. I would sit in front of this computer and say to myself "Self, you will post on your blog today. Self, you will read this book today. Self, you will do something that you actually have to think about doing for more than 5 minutes." And for the longest time, I just simply didn't have the level of concentration I needed to stay on task. It felt like I couldn't think straight.
I dealt with depression for a while, and then I dealt with anger for a while and then I just dealt with dealing with emotions that I used to suffocate with nicotine and tar. Because if you can't cover them up with chemicals, you just have to go through them. And that has sucked on more than a couple of days. But I got through it.
Anyhow, not trying to sound like an anti-drug campaign. But here I am, almost a year later and I am LOVING every minute of it now. It is NICE to be able to breathe, and it is NICE to be able to walk a mile, or two, and not feel like your lungs are bursting.
I know I'm probably not making much sense. And that's okay. At least some things have stayed the same.
Peace allllllllllllll.....................
When I quit smoking, almost a year ago, I never realized the effects that it would have on me mentally. Of course, I had read about the physical benefits and was told that the physical discomfort of withdrawal would not last very long. And that was true, all of it. I breathe better, I can actually smell things, I don't cough unless I have a cold and even then it is nowhere near as lung shattering as it was when I smoked a couple of packs a day. So, my body is grateful.
But I had never taken into consideration what my mind might go through during this process. It has been quite a trip. Let me explain.
Nicotine causes the brain to release dopamine. Dopamine causes a person to feel relaxed. Yes, that's an oversimplified statement or two but that's the upshot of the whole scenario. When one ceases ingesting nicotine, within 72 hours, the brain has started to basically rewire itself. (Brains are cool like that.) The brain is alright with that. You, as a new ex-smoker might not be......for a while. Because it takes a while to come through the other side of the looking glass.
For months, I could not concentrate. I would sit in front of this computer and say to myself "Self, you will post on your blog today. Self, you will read this book today. Self, you will do something that you actually have to think about doing for more than 5 minutes." And for the longest time, I just simply didn't have the level of concentration I needed to stay on task. It felt like I couldn't think straight.
I dealt with depression for a while, and then I dealt with anger for a while and then I just dealt with dealing with emotions that I used to suffocate with nicotine and tar. Because if you can't cover them up with chemicals, you just have to go through them. And that has sucked on more than a couple of days. But I got through it.
Anyhow, not trying to sound like an anti-drug campaign. But here I am, almost a year later and I am LOVING every minute of it now. It is NICE to be able to breathe, and it is NICE to be able to walk a mile, or two, and not feel like your lungs are bursting.
I know I'm probably not making much sense. And that's okay. At least some things have stayed the same.
Peace allllllllllllll.....................
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
I know...... ..I know I haven't been around like I should.
I know that I have neglected my blog terribly.
I know that I'm a rotten person and a horrible individual.
But I still love you all!!!
WISHING EACH AND EVERYONE ONE OF YOU A WONDERFULLY BLESSED AND BRIGHT CHRISTMAS!!
And may God bless us every one!
Peace alllllllllllllll..........................
I know that I have neglected my blog terribly.
I know that I'm a rotten person and a horrible individual.
But I still love you all!!!
WISHING EACH AND EVERYONE ONE OF YOU A WONDERFULLY BLESSED AND BRIGHT CHRISTMAS!!
And may God bless us every one!
Peace alllllllllllllll..........................
Friday, November 21, 2008
Tired, Tired and More Tired
I am so tired. Not necessarily physically tired, although there is that, but just tired of things going on around me lately. I have tried to ignore them but they have just taken over.
I am tired of morning talk shows on the radio. I don't turn on the radio because I want to hear someone flapping their gums. I turn on the radio because I want to hear some music. Music, please. And yet, between the hours of 5 a.m. and 11 a.m. I cannot find any music on the radio. All I hear are people talking and talking and talking about what they like and what they don't like and what this country should do about that country and on and on and on and blah, blah and blah. I can talk to myself and hear that. First thing in the morning is when I need a pick me up, a boost, a little jumpstart. I want to hear, no I NEED to hear "We're Not Gonna Take It" by Twisted Sister or "Working for the Weekend" by Loverboy on the way home from taking the kids to school. I don't need to hear someone's opinion on why frog penis is the new wonder drug.
I am tired of having this whole "go green......or else" issue shoved down my throat. I am a tree hugger, yes I am. Have been since I was a kid, when it was considered weird or hippyish. But this thing today has long since ceased to be about the environment. This is a political movement, a force if you will, that has taken on a life of its own. Someone must be making a whole lottttttt of money off of this. Going green has become fashionable, not necessarily conscionable. And it just leaves a bad taste in my mouth.
Speaking of bad tastes in the mouth, I am also tired of people telling me that if I eat meat, then I must not love animals. Are you nuts?? Much like the tree hugging, I have been an animal rights activist most of my life. I wrote a letter to then President Ford protesting animal testing when I was 8 years old, so please spare me. If you don't know me, then don't attempt to put me in the box where you think I belong.
I am tired of the eternal infernal celebrity news coverage on television.
I am tired of people's lives being reduced to sound bites on the 6 o'clock news.
I am tired of the educational system leaving NO room for individuality in children and attempting to either force them into a cookie cutter mold or labeling them as "problematic". And then, in a move of the utmost hypocrisy, telling them to "be themselves".
And I am tired of my husband just dropping his stuff (clothes, books, work manuals) wherever it lands and then expecting me to know what happened to it the next day. Just because I happen to be the ONLY one that cleans the house, what does that make me a suspect:)?
And now I am really tired, so I think I'll take a nap.
Peace alllllllllllllllllll................
I am tired of morning talk shows on the radio. I don't turn on the radio because I want to hear someone flapping their gums. I turn on the radio because I want to hear some music. Music, please. And yet, between the hours of 5 a.m. and 11 a.m. I cannot find any music on the radio. All I hear are people talking and talking and talking about what they like and what they don't like and what this country should do about that country and on and on and on and blah, blah and blah. I can talk to myself and hear that. First thing in the morning is when I need a pick me up, a boost, a little jumpstart. I want to hear, no I NEED to hear "We're Not Gonna Take It" by Twisted Sister or "Working for the Weekend" by Loverboy on the way home from taking the kids to school. I don't need to hear someone's opinion on why frog penis is the new wonder drug.
I am tired of having this whole "go green......or else" issue shoved down my throat. I am a tree hugger, yes I am. Have been since I was a kid, when it was considered weird or hippyish. But this thing today has long since ceased to be about the environment. This is a political movement, a force if you will, that has taken on a life of its own. Someone must be making a whole lottttttt of money off of this. Going green has become fashionable, not necessarily conscionable. And it just leaves a bad taste in my mouth.
Speaking of bad tastes in the mouth, I am also tired of people telling me that if I eat meat, then I must not love animals. Are you nuts?? Much like the tree hugging, I have been an animal rights activist most of my life. I wrote a letter to then President Ford protesting animal testing when I was 8 years old, so please spare me. If you don't know me, then don't attempt to put me in the box where you think I belong.
I am tired of the eternal infernal celebrity news coverage on television.
I am tired of people's lives being reduced to sound bites on the 6 o'clock news.
I am tired of the educational system leaving NO room for individuality in children and attempting to either force them into a cookie cutter mold or labeling them as "problematic". And then, in a move of the utmost hypocrisy, telling them to "be themselves".
And I am tired of my husband just dropping his stuff (clothes, books, work manuals) wherever it lands and then expecting me to know what happened to it the next day. Just because I happen to be the ONLY one that cleans the house, what does that make me a suspect:)?
And now I am really tired, so I think I'll take a nap.
Peace alllllllllllllllllll................
Monday, November 10, 2008
Politics Again?
First of all, let me start by saying that I really am very uncomfortable with discussing politics. I have my personal opinions and I don't expect them to be anyone else's opinion and we all have the freedom to think what we like. Okay, having said that, I really need to say this.
For those of you who may not realize it, the election is over. Okay? OVER. Whoever you voted for at this point is irrelevant. The deed is done, the die is cast and so on. And yet people are still yapping about it like there is something left to be done, like forgetting to turn the stove off.
One of the things that I have been seeing lately that is really igging me (igging is not a real word I know, but it's one of mine:)) is this all out Republican attack on Sarah Palin. You can't blame her for McCain's loss. Sure, there were a lot of people who didn't agree with her personal politics. Sure, there were a lot of vegetarians who were simply abhorred at the fact that she would shoot a moose. Sure, there were a lot of redneck men jealous that she could shoot a moose. (That's not women's work ya know!) And there are even more people who didn't like her for whatever reason, from her politics to the style of her eyeglasses. I really do not think that is why they didn't vote for McCain.
See, when I vote, I like to think of myself as voting FOR someone, not necessarily AGAINST someone. I vote for the person I would like to see in office, not against someone I don't want to see there. See? It's all in how you look at it. And I don't think that Palin wielded that kind of influence over millions of votes. Just get off her back and let it go already. Scapegoating never looks good on anyone.
And this whole is Obama a real citizen issue. I don't know and at this point I don't care. *GASP* "Why!?!" you may ask. Well, I'll tell you why. All of this garbage about the man's citizenship should have been resolved before he was ever allowed to run. And yes, I say "allowed" because there are rules one must follow to participate in the privilege of running for President. If he was not following those rules, if he didn't fit the criteria, before he started running, something should have been done about it then. It's a little too late now. It's kind of like being in labor and deciding to put the baby back. Ummmmm.....you can't do that. And in trying, it looks rather sad and desperate. The man did win, some say fair and square, others say not. But the upshot is, that he will be taking office in January. And since he will be our leader, I will give him just as much respect and courtesy as I have our previous leaders:)
Exactly.
So, can't we all just get along?
Just my opinion.
Peace alllllllllllllllllll.......................
For those of you who may not realize it, the election is over. Okay? OVER. Whoever you voted for at this point is irrelevant. The deed is done, the die is cast and so on. And yet people are still yapping about it like there is something left to be done, like forgetting to turn the stove off.
One of the things that I have been seeing lately that is really igging me (igging is not a real word I know, but it's one of mine:)) is this all out Republican attack on Sarah Palin. You can't blame her for McCain's loss. Sure, there were a lot of people who didn't agree with her personal politics. Sure, there were a lot of vegetarians who were simply abhorred at the fact that she would shoot a moose. Sure, there were a lot of redneck men jealous that she could shoot a moose. (That's not women's work ya know!) And there are even more people who didn't like her for whatever reason, from her politics to the style of her eyeglasses. I really do not think that is why they didn't vote for McCain.
See, when I vote, I like to think of myself as voting FOR someone, not necessarily AGAINST someone. I vote for the person I would like to see in office, not against someone I don't want to see there. See? It's all in how you look at it. And I don't think that Palin wielded that kind of influence over millions of votes. Just get off her back and let it go already. Scapegoating never looks good on anyone.
And this whole is Obama a real citizen issue. I don't know and at this point I don't care. *GASP* "Why!?!" you may ask. Well, I'll tell you why. All of this garbage about the man's citizenship should have been resolved before he was ever allowed to run. And yes, I say "allowed" because there are rules one must follow to participate in the privilege of running for President. If he was not following those rules, if he didn't fit the criteria, before he started running, something should have been done about it then. It's a little too late now. It's kind of like being in labor and deciding to put the baby back. Ummmmm.....you can't do that. And in trying, it looks rather sad and desperate. The man did win, some say fair and square, others say not. But the upshot is, that he will be taking office in January. And since he will be our leader, I will give him just as much respect and courtesy as I have our previous leaders:)
Exactly.
So, can't we all just get along?
Just my opinion.
Peace alllllllllllllllllll.......................
Wednesday, November 05, 2008
Mr. President
Last night, as I was taking out the trash, I stopped out by the curb and listened. In the distance I could hear fireworks going off and maybe two, three streets over I heard a woman shout "OBAMA I WANNA HAVE YOUR BABY!!" (did I mention I love my neighborhood?:)) And although I do not want to have President elect Obama's baby, (I have enough of my own and Grover's thank you), I do wish him the absolute best during his term. A lot of people are looking for great things and today, this country seems more hopeful than it has in a long time.
I only wish my mom and Rachel's parents (and a long list of other people) could have been alive to see this. Wow. I wish that I could be more eloquent but I can't so I'll just leave it at that.
Wow.
Peace allllllllllll...................
I only wish my mom and Rachel's parents (and a long list of other people) could have been alive to see this. Wow. I wish that I could be more eloquent but I can't so I'll just leave it at that.
Wow.
Peace allllllllllll...................
Friday, October 31, 2008
Saturday, October 11, 2008
Because Some Days
Because some days I just shouldn't leave the house.
We ran out of pickles today and so I decided to hop in the car and run to the dollar store real quick and buy some. The dollar store is maybe a quarter of a mile from our house. Two turns and you're there. Fine. It was on the second turn that I cut the wheels a little too close I guess and hit the curb with the front and back tires....HARD. Rattled my nerves a little, not to mention the fact that it was quite embarassing. But I trudge on to the dollar store anyway. Grabbed a little basket, got my pickles, put them in the basket and went to stand in line at the check-out. (This store always has a line....ALWAYS...and the slowest cashiers in the land.....but they're close so whatareyagonnado?) Waiting in line and I don't know how this happened but some way or another my pickles flipped out of my little basket and fell to the floor, in an explosion of glass and pickle juice. (Did I mention I was like 5th in a line of 11?) Oh, what fun. Young girl came out to clean up the mess and I helped her get it cleaned up, because I felt incredibly guilty for being so incredibly clumsy, lost my place in line and waited another 10 minutes, still horribly embarassed, before I could finally pay for my pickles and leave.
Upon leaving the dollar store, I realized I needed to go across the street to the convenience store and pick up a bag of ice (no the dollar store doesn't sell it and even if it did, I would not have gone back in there). So, I went across the street, parked in that madhouse maze between the gas pumps, half of which were out of order and the other half of which were simply out of gas, went in the store and bought my ice. Came out, everything's lovely. Tossed the bag of ice on the front passenger seat. You know, the comfy, cushy, upholstered front passenger seat. The bag of ice immediately split open all over the front seat of the car. I saved what I could, chunked the rest and got myself home as fast as possible.
Sometimes you just shouldn't leave the house. I'm just thanking the good Lord I made it home in one piece. May not have made it home gracefully, but at least I got there safely:)
Peace allllllllllllll.....................
We ran out of pickles today and so I decided to hop in the car and run to the dollar store real quick and buy some. The dollar store is maybe a quarter of a mile from our house. Two turns and you're there. Fine. It was on the second turn that I cut the wheels a little too close I guess and hit the curb with the front and back tires....HARD. Rattled my nerves a little, not to mention the fact that it was quite embarassing. But I trudge on to the dollar store anyway. Grabbed a little basket, got my pickles, put them in the basket and went to stand in line at the check-out. (This store always has a line....ALWAYS...and the slowest cashiers in the land.....but they're close so whatareyagonnado?) Waiting in line and I don't know how this happened but some way or another my pickles flipped out of my little basket and fell to the floor, in an explosion of glass and pickle juice. (Did I mention I was like 5th in a line of 11?) Oh, what fun. Young girl came out to clean up the mess and I helped her get it cleaned up, because I felt incredibly guilty for being so incredibly clumsy, lost my place in line and waited another 10 minutes, still horribly embarassed, before I could finally pay for my pickles and leave.
Upon leaving the dollar store, I realized I needed to go across the street to the convenience store and pick up a bag of ice (no the dollar store doesn't sell it and even if it did, I would not have gone back in there). So, I went across the street, parked in that madhouse maze between the gas pumps, half of which were out of order and the other half of which were simply out of gas, went in the store and bought my ice. Came out, everything's lovely. Tossed the bag of ice on the front passenger seat. You know, the comfy, cushy, upholstered front passenger seat. The bag of ice immediately split open all over the front seat of the car. I saved what I could, chunked the rest and got myself home as fast as possible.
Sometimes you just shouldn't leave the house. I'm just thanking the good Lord I made it home in one piece. May not have made it home gracefully, but at least I got there safely:)
Peace allllllllllllll.....................
Monday, October 06, 2008
Taking a Breath
Finally! Fall break has arrived and I don't have to take kids to school this week, I don't have to get up at the crack of dawn this week, I don't have to call teachers or talk to PTA people or look presentable or do anything other than schlep around and clean the house. No homework, no laundry, no pairing off of the Garanimals every night (or a week's worth on Sunday night), just playing outside and enjoying the falling leaves. Aaaaaahhhhh......
So, now that I finally have a chance to sit down and write....or read...or breathe. Lots and lots of things have been going on in the world and don't think I haven't noticed.
First of all, congratulations OJ Simpson. You might not have paid for the first time but thank the good Lord someone is ensuring you pay for your second. It does come around in the end after all don't it?
Second, I don't ordinarily watch the television show The View. My friend Rachel does and since she spent the night over here last night, guests rule and we watched it this morning. That Elizabeth (sp?) chick is a dope. Yes, she has the right to her own opinions and free speech and all that. Just quit bein such a big crybaby about everything. The doe eyes and the pouty lip thing....does that ever really work?
And thirdly, the debates. I have enjoyed the first two better than anything you could possibly catch at the movie theater. I have laughed, I have cried, I have gasped in shock. Really? No, not really. But they have been entertaining. It's always fun for me to see who can outcon the other. The concerned facial expressions and the warm body language. These guys...if politics ever fails, then Broadway would love to have 'em. Am I a little cynical concerning our Presidential and Vice Presidential hopefuls? Little bit, yeah.
Speaking of the candidates however, one thing. If you choose to divulge for whom you will be voting, then that's cool. That's your business, after all. If you choose NOT to divulge for whom you will be voting, then that's cool too. That's YOUR business, after all. I don't feel anyone should be coerced into sharing their politicial opinions. That's why we have SECRET ballots, because some things are just not anyone else's business.
But, however it goes, it is gonna be an interesting next few weeks.
Now, I'm off to see where I can buy the best Halloween candy.:)
Peace allllllll................
So, now that I finally have a chance to sit down and write....or read...or breathe. Lots and lots of things have been going on in the world and don't think I haven't noticed.
First of all, congratulations OJ Simpson. You might not have paid for the first time but thank the good Lord someone is ensuring you pay for your second. It does come around in the end after all don't it?
Second, I don't ordinarily watch the television show The View. My friend Rachel does and since she spent the night over here last night, guests rule and we watched it this morning. That Elizabeth (sp?) chick is a dope. Yes, she has the right to her own opinions and free speech and all that. Just quit bein such a big crybaby about everything. The doe eyes and the pouty lip thing....does that ever really work?
And thirdly, the debates. I have enjoyed the first two better than anything you could possibly catch at the movie theater. I have laughed, I have cried, I have gasped in shock. Really? No, not really. But they have been entertaining. It's always fun for me to see who can outcon the other. The concerned facial expressions and the warm body language. These guys...if politics ever fails, then Broadway would love to have 'em. Am I a little cynical concerning our Presidential and Vice Presidential hopefuls? Little bit, yeah.
Speaking of the candidates however, one thing. If you choose to divulge for whom you will be voting, then that's cool. That's your business, after all. If you choose NOT to divulge for whom you will be voting, then that's cool too. That's YOUR business, after all. I don't feel anyone should be coerced into sharing their politicial opinions. That's why we have SECRET ballots, because some things are just not anyone else's business.
But, however it goes, it is gonna be an interesting next few weeks.
Now, I'm off to see where I can buy the best Halloween candy.:)
Peace allllllll................
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Snoots
Meet the newest member of the Sprinkle household. Her name is Snoots. One of Grover's friends from work had a friend who was going to give her to the dog pound, so we decided we would take her. And can you blame us? Who could resist that face??
And so now, after a bath, a flea dip and a vet's appointment later, she is firmly ensconced in the household. Now, if I could just get the cats to like her, everything will be lovely!
Peace allllllllllllll..............
Thursday, September 11, 2008
HBD to My Joshie
And now, for the young man who never met a camera he didn't love:HAPPY 15TH BIRTHDAY TO MY BIGGEST BOY, MY OLDEST, MY MOONA TUNA..........JOSHIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (and no, you will not be using my car to learn how to drive in...but I love you anyway!:))
Peace alllllllllllllllllllllllllll.........................
Thursday, September 04, 2008
9/05
I had originally posted this on August 27, 2005 but I needed to post it again. September 5, 1997 was on a Friday too:
The date was September 5, 1997. A little boy, 3, a little girl,2, and a lady were asleep in their apartment. They had fallen asleep in the living room while watching Cartoon Network. The kids had fallen asleep first and the lady wondered momentarily if she should carry them to their bedrooms but decided against it as their grandmother would be returning home from work soon and they could put the kids in bed then. Not an unusual event for any of them. The lady stretched out on the other couch and in no time had dozed off herself.
She was awakened by the smoke. Sitting straight up on the couch, she called for the children. It was then that she realized the entire wall by the front door was on fire. Not being able to see through the smoke, she had to rely on the children's voices to give her an approximation of where they were. She runs to the front door, grabbing one child's hand as she goes. She doesn't know which child it is, just that it's one of them. She opens the door and pushes the child through it. As she turns around to grab the other child no more than 3 feet away, the room explodes and throws her across the hallway into the door of the other apartment.
By this time the neighbors are there, the living room is engulfed in flames, someone's calling 911 and someone has gone to the back to try to get into the apartment that way. It's impossible. The lady is still trying to get through the front door to reach her other child but the neighbors are holding her back because (as she was told later) the heat was simply too intense to get through. She can hear her child calling her name, screaming for her. So she keeps trying to get in. But she can't. It isn't until the fire department comes and forcibly removes her that she stops.
So they can do their jobs.
The fire department is notified, however, that the lady's upstairs neighbors have a propane grill on the balcony upstairs. At that point, they refuse to go in to try to rescue the child, because "it's too dangerous." They simply try to put the fire out. It seems to go on forever.
At some point, the lady really doesn't know when because time and reality have ceased to exist for the moment, the fire is extinguished. She knows that her child didn't make it, but hopes against all hope anyway.
She walks up to a fireman and asks him "Did you find the little girl?" He responds "Yeah, what was left of her." Torn between being dying herself and wanting to kill this man, she simply says "I'm her mother" and walks away. The fireman rushes after her saying that he didn't know and she tells him "That shouldn't have mattered."
Briana Grace Brown died on September 5, 1997. We buried her on September 10, 1997. Rachel (her grandmother)...her father died on September 17th, exactly one week after Briana's funeral. He couldn't take it.
In the space of six months, from March 17, 1997 to September 17, 1997 I lost my mother, my father, Briana, and the man who had been like a second dad to me. And I don't mean to lessen the others but Briana was my child. She's the one that ...when her life ended, so did half of mine.
During the week of the funeral, we stayed at Rachel's sister's house until we could find another place. One day I was sitting in the bedroom and watched someone come out of the bathroom. And I knew that there were razor blades in the bathroom. And it just seemed like it would be so easy and mercifully quick. I was getting up to go there when two thoughts stopped me.
1. If you do this you'll go to hell and you'll never see her again.
2. What would Josh do? He wouldn't be able to deal with both of you gone. You have to be there for him, even if you don't feel like you're going to make it yourself.
And so I stopped.
In December of 1996, I had a tattoo put on my upper right arm. It is the only one I have. It is a phoenix. At the time, I liked the symbolism of rising up from the ashes. If only I had known how prophetic it would turn out to be 10 months later.
It's getting close to that time of year again. Briana would have been 13 years old this year. Some days are good, some not so good. Some nights I can go to sleep. Some nights I still hear her screaming my name and I cry myself to sleep.
Joshua and I talk about it sometimes, more often than not we don't. See, we were the only ones there that night and we already know what the other one's going through. It's a bond we share, one that neither one of us would have chosen voluntarily. But oftentimes it makes conversation unnecessary.
I get glimpses of her every now and again. The way Josh will move his hand or tell a joke and laugh at himself like she used to...a little girl who looks just like her but isn't her..and I feel her around me sometimes it seems. Crazy? I don't think so. I think it's just God's way of sending comfort my way.
I just hope that when I get to Heaven she remembers me and finds no fault with how I've turned out.
Why did I decide to tell this? Because I wanted everyone to know that there once was a girl named Briana Grace Brown.
And she was loved more than you will ever know.
Peace alllll..............
The date was September 5, 1997. A little boy, 3, a little girl,2, and a lady were asleep in their apartment. They had fallen asleep in the living room while watching Cartoon Network. The kids had fallen asleep first and the lady wondered momentarily if she should carry them to their bedrooms but decided against it as their grandmother would be returning home from work soon and they could put the kids in bed then. Not an unusual event for any of them. The lady stretched out on the other couch and in no time had dozed off herself.
She was awakened by the smoke. Sitting straight up on the couch, she called for the children. It was then that she realized the entire wall by the front door was on fire. Not being able to see through the smoke, she had to rely on the children's voices to give her an approximation of where they were. She runs to the front door, grabbing one child's hand as she goes. She doesn't know which child it is, just that it's one of them. She opens the door and pushes the child through it. As she turns around to grab the other child no more than 3 feet away, the room explodes and throws her across the hallway into the door of the other apartment.
By this time the neighbors are there, the living room is engulfed in flames, someone's calling 911 and someone has gone to the back to try to get into the apartment that way. It's impossible. The lady is still trying to get through the front door to reach her other child but the neighbors are holding her back because (as she was told later) the heat was simply too intense to get through. She can hear her child calling her name, screaming for her. So she keeps trying to get in. But she can't. It isn't until the fire department comes and forcibly removes her that she stops.
So they can do their jobs.
The fire department is notified, however, that the lady's upstairs neighbors have a propane grill on the balcony upstairs. At that point, they refuse to go in to try to rescue the child, because "it's too dangerous." They simply try to put the fire out. It seems to go on forever.
At some point, the lady really doesn't know when because time and reality have ceased to exist for the moment, the fire is extinguished. She knows that her child didn't make it, but hopes against all hope anyway.
She walks up to a fireman and asks him "Did you find the little girl?" He responds "Yeah, what was left of her." Torn between being dying herself and wanting to kill this man, she simply says "I'm her mother" and walks away. The fireman rushes after her saying that he didn't know and she tells him "That shouldn't have mattered."
Briana Grace Brown died on September 5, 1997. We buried her on September 10, 1997. Rachel (her grandmother)...her father died on September 17th, exactly one week after Briana's funeral. He couldn't take it.
In the space of six months, from March 17, 1997 to September 17, 1997 I lost my mother, my father, Briana, and the man who had been like a second dad to me. And I don't mean to lessen the others but Briana was my child. She's the one that ...when her life ended, so did half of mine.
During the week of the funeral, we stayed at Rachel's sister's house until we could find another place. One day I was sitting in the bedroom and watched someone come out of the bathroom. And I knew that there were razor blades in the bathroom. And it just seemed like it would be so easy and mercifully quick. I was getting up to go there when two thoughts stopped me.
1. If you do this you'll go to hell and you'll never see her again.
2. What would Josh do? He wouldn't be able to deal with both of you gone. You have to be there for him, even if you don't feel like you're going to make it yourself.
And so I stopped.
In December of 1996, I had a tattoo put on my upper right arm. It is the only one I have. It is a phoenix. At the time, I liked the symbolism of rising up from the ashes. If only I had known how prophetic it would turn out to be 10 months later.
It's getting close to that time of year again. Briana would have been 13 years old this year. Some days are good, some not so good. Some nights I can go to sleep. Some nights I still hear her screaming my name and I cry myself to sleep.
Joshua and I talk about it sometimes, more often than not we don't. See, we were the only ones there that night and we already know what the other one's going through. It's a bond we share, one that neither one of us would have chosen voluntarily. But oftentimes it makes conversation unnecessary.
I get glimpses of her every now and again. The way Josh will move his hand or tell a joke and laugh at himself like she used to...a little girl who looks just like her but isn't her..and I feel her around me sometimes it seems. Crazy? I don't think so. I think it's just God's way of sending comfort my way.
I just hope that when I get to Heaven she remembers me and finds no fault with how I've turned out.
Why did I decide to tell this? Because I wanted everyone to know that there once was a girl named Briana Grace Brown.
And she was loved more than you will ever know.
Peace alllll..............
Wednesday, September 03, 2008
Where Was I Again?
Good grief...
Who knew that there was this much to do with 3 kids in school? Well, the people out there with 3 kids in school obviously. Wow.....between getting them up, getting them ready, getting them to two different schools (on time, no less), half-days, PTA, volunteering for a million different things, Fall pictures (already!), Fall fundraisers (already!), Band fundraisers (always), getting them home from school, doctor's appointments, dentist appointments, signing up for this, that and the other....I don't even know what I am doing half the time anymore. But I am having a BLAST doing it! Who knew it could be this much fun?!
Only one problem (and isn't there always just one?).....one of the teachers. She's not mean or anything, she's just.....maybe....I don't know....a little cold for a kindergarten teacher (in my opinion anyway). This would be Jakob's teacher. Lukas' teacher is a real, old-fashioned good teacher. I love her to pieces. You can tell just from talking to her that she really loves her job (she's been teaching for about 20 years) and she has a real heart for children (you can't fake that, no matter how hard you try). She's not syrupy sweet but she is really kind-hearted with her kids and Lukas and the rest of them are just crazy about her.
Jakob's teacher, on the other hand, is the "cold" one. She's nice enough but it's like a fake nice. It really makes me uncomfortable. Jakob likes her well enough, so it's just me that has the issue. And I don't want to show favoritism between the two teachers (since I have to see and talk to them both everyday) because I wouldn't want the kids to be affected by it. Anyhow, it's just one of those irritations that you find in life and ordinarily it would just be something for me to fuss about, but since it involves my boys, it kinda makes it something else.
Anyhow, I'll get over it, I'm sure.:)
And I just wanted to drop in and let everyone know, I'm still around and as soon as I can get my schedule organized then I may actually have time to sit down and blog (or stand up and blog, either one is fine).
Oh, yeah, don't forget: HALLOWEEN IS IN 57 DAYS!! (And we all know that is the kickoff to the holiday season) So, get your battle armor on, because it's almost time to go Christmas shopping!!!!!! (Too soon? Please, I've got a Christmas tree put up in the spare bedroom. It's not decorated but it's standing there and has been since the end of July. Don't ask.)
Peace allllllllllllllllllll................
Who knew that there was this much to do with 3 kids in school? Well, the people out there with 3 kids in school obviously. Wow.....between getting them up, getting them ready, getting them to two different schools (on time, no less), half-days, PTA, volunteering for a million different things, Fall pictures (already!), Fall fundraisers (already!), Band fundraisers (always), getting them home from school, doctor's appointments, dentist appointments, signing up for this, that and the other....I don't even know what I am doing half the time anymore. But I am having a BLAST doing it! Who knew it could be this much fun?!
Only one problem (and isn't there always just one?).....one of the teachers. She's not mean or anything, she's just.....maybe....I don't know....a little cold for a kindergarten teacher (in my opinion anyway). This would be Jakob's teacher. Lukas' teacher is a real, old-fashioned good teacher. I love her to pieces. You can tell just from talking to her that she really loves her job (she's been teaching for about 20 years) and she has a real heart for children (you can't fake that, no matter how hard you try). She's not syrupy sweet but she is really kind-hearted with her kids and Lukas and the rest of them are just crazy about her.
Jakob's teacher, on the other hand, is the "cold" one. She's nice enough but it's like a fake nice. It really makes me uncomfortable. Jakob likes her well enough, so it's just me that has the issue. And I don't want to show favoritism between the two teachers (since I have to see and talk to them both everyday) because I wouldn't want the kids to be affected by it. Anyhow, it's just one of those irritations that you find in life and ordinarily it would just be something for me to fuss about, but since it involves my boys, it kinda makes it something else.
Anyhow, I'll get over it, I'm sure.:)
And I just wanted to drop in and let everyone know, I'm still around and as soon as I can get my schedule organized then I may actually have time to sit down and blog (or stand up and blog, either one is fine).
Oh, yeah, don't forget: HALLOWEEN IS IN 57 DAYS!! (And we all know that is the kickoff to the holiday season) So, get your battle armor on, because it's almost time to go Christmas shopping!!!!!! (Too soon? Please, I've got a Christmas tree put up in the spare bedroom. It's not decorated but it's standing there and has been since the end of July. Don't ask.)
Peace allllllllllllllllllll................
Saturday, August 23, 2008
Guess What?
Hey guess what?
In three days, I will have been a non-smoker for 5 whole months! Whoo Hoo!!!!!
In the past 3 weeks or so I have lost 5 pounds and 2 inches in the waist. Whoo Hoo!!!! America's Next Top Model, here I come!!! (Yes, I KNOW I am too old for that show!)
And speaking of old, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!~!!! I am a raging, ravishing 41 year old today! And yet another Whoo Hoo!!! for me. And for the first time in my ENTIRE life, I have not mentioned my birthday to anyone at all in the past couple of months (like I usually do). I want to see who remembers on their own. This is gonna be fun, I can tell!:)
So, I'm healthier, lighter and one year more experienced . Does it get any better?!?!?
Blessings on everyone!
Peace allllllllllllllll....................
In three days, I will have been a non-smoker for 5 whole months! Whoo Hoo!!!!!
In the past 3 weeks or so I have lost 5 pounds and 2 inches in the waist. Whoo Hoo!!!! America's Next Top Model, here I come!!! (Yes, I KNOW I am too old for that show!)
And speaking of old, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!~!!! I am a raging, ravishing 41 year old today! And yet another Whoo Hoo!!! for me. And for the first time in my ENTIRE life, I have not mentioned my birthday to anyone at all in the past couple of months (like I usually do). I want to see who remembers on their own. This is gonna be fun, I can tell!:)
So, I'm healthier, lighter and one year more experienced . Does it get any better?!?!?
Blessings on everyone!
Peace allllllllllllllll....................
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